Life's been nuttier than usual lately. I'm about pulling my hair out what with the lack of sleep, long drives, new job, and suddenly too many volunteer activities. With the elections looming, the opportunities for volunteering just grow exponentially. So I haven't had time to, um, clean. Or grocery shop, or drop off laundry, and barely any time to write. But I'm really excited about something I got two weekends ago, and am just now getting around to sharing the news with everyone. It was important that I take some time to make this public service announcement because what good is a really great idea or thing if it's a secret? If I don't share this idea with everyone I care about?
I really needed something to simplify my life. It's gotten to the point where I can't handle everything the way I used to. Multi-tasking has reached epic dimensions around here. I'm worn out, pressed for time, stressed, and just needed something significant to change. And let's face it: I'm also not as spry or nimble or flexible as I used to be. I really long to get back into yoga, but the pesky time problem isn't allowing it. Who's got 90 minutes to be lolling around and stretching while they're awake and out of bed? Not me.
Back to my discovery. I've heard people tell of the wonders of hiring a housekeeper. Or a once-a-week chef. Or a personal shopper. Believe you me, they all sound very attractive. Unfortunately, we have a pesky budget problem too. So although those things would all be very nice and helpful, they ain't gonna happen at this address. My discovery was useful and cheap. Who knew?
Well, actually, I think a lot of people circa 1975 did know. They knew a good thing when they saw it, and gazillions of these time- and energy- and sanity- and back-saving devices were sold. Gazillions of Clappers (TM) is what I mean. That nifty device that you hook up to a lamp or the TV or whatever, and boy has it made a difference in my life. I didn't know what I was missing during all the years since they started with the silly "Clap ON! Clap OFF! Clap On, Clap Off . . . The CLAPPER (TM)!" commercials on TV.
I got my Clapper (TM) to hook up to a lamp that was, previously, a problem lamp. It's located behind my couch, and I have no outlets in the room hooked up to a light switch. So . . . in order to turn the lamp on and off each and every day (a phenomenally time-consuming task), I had to put one knee on the sofa, reach behind it, and turn the switch. Pain in the a**. And in the back. I was risking a herniated disk every time I needed light to read! What stupid and time-consuming risks I was taking! I was mad as hell and not gonna take it any more.
But those days are over. My personal time has now been liberated from this mundane and disk-threatening daily maneuver. I just walk into the room, clap twice as far as ten feet away from the couch, and a second later the lamp extends it's warm cozy glow across the room to meet me. To meet me! From across the room!
I'm ecstatic, and just had to share the news of this incredible device with you in case you, like me, had heard those commercials 30 years ago and never quite believed The Clapper (TM) was all it's clapped up to be. It is everything they promised.
For Christmas, in case you're shopping, I think I'd like a Chia Pet, OK?
PS: I don't need that "First Alert" thing. I'm gonna have the Irish First Alert. I'll wear a bottle of Jamesons tied around my neck with a sign that says "I've fallen and I don't want to get up."
Now THAT is a handy PSA! I have a hanging lamp that is a pain in my a**, and low back, and it happens to be the primary laptop-light! I need a clapper!
Chia pet, eh? Will you have time to water it and watch it grow?
Posted by: scorpy | Wednesday, October 12, 2005 at 08:32 AM
I can imagine that's easier than fumbling for a switch in the dark. Good to know they actually work!
Posted by: Becky | Wednesday, October 12, 2005 at 06:50 PM